Salvation

DVD, Smallville S9 (Salvation)

I can't help feeling they played their last card. The final piece of business the series offered was the secret still kept from Lois. Once she knows that, there's nothing left to play, no mystery to hide: everyone that matters, knows. And yes, it has been a bit of a joke on her, it does make her look exceedingly dense for not seeing what everyone else does, and for not joining all the dots of myriad plots she's experienced, even from the time she first appeared back in Season 4. But that was the fun of the character, and the tension of how she could be involved in doing important stuff, yet not know the secret identity of The Blur she served. Did Clark really think he'd get away with giving her a big, sloppy kiss in the shadows instead of saying anything and she wouldn't recognise him from that? Superman? Super-daft, more like. Unfortunately, that describes the majority of this season finale, but what can you expect? It's a season finale of 'Smallville,' it's not designed to make sense. Even more than ever it feels like it was written by The Blur, story points whizzing across the screen like ants on the attack, a swarm of events, people and places, and it's almost a chore to have to think back over all that happened and point out the glaring flaws and lazy plotting. I think it's because some of this season (genuine shock and horror), was well written. It's true, in defiance of the series' golden rules of storytelling (don't stand still for long enough to let the audience realise there's really no story, it's all just arbitrary decisions to get the most bang in the quickest time), Lois and Clark worked.

When it was about them it could even be like real drama. That is, not comic book, ridiculous lack of logic 'drama,' but real stakes. It does help that Erica Durance is the best actor in the series and her oddball characterisation of bimbo-ish heroism has grown where the series has generally shrunk into its recesses. Whenever it tries to be BIG, it makes it about a threat to the whole world, but it actually becomes harder to believe in and accept, you're as detached from real life and care as Hawkman, Stargirl, Black Canary and Cyborg were on their monitors (where's Aquaman, doesn't he know how to use a computer, or couldn't he be bothered - maybe they couldn't get the actor back?). A case in point: Zod's minions show how bad they are, and what a threat to Earth they pose, by… well, setting fire to important monuments. Burning Zod's symbol into the Great Pyramid, the Great Wall of China and other famous landmarks might have made for a striking series of images (if the effects weren't so ropey, even for the series' standards), if it was so unimportant to the plot. It's purely there to provide bombast and spectacle, to try and make you gasp in disbelief: how could they pull such an audacious stunt off? I can see where they're coming from, they're giving the impression of the world affected: by presenting well-known landmarks its audience would easily identify, but it was a failure in creating any tension or sense of threat. So the Kandorians can go and burn up Earth's ancient wonders. So what?

Under the subject of 'burning, so what?' we have Tess Mercer, apparently burned to death by Zod for her traitorous acts. Except this maniac holds back his anger (unlike him), to just burn, with precision, half her face. Now I understand they weren't going to show a burned up Tess in a series like this, but her clothes were unaffected, it was purely surface burns to one side of the face. All so she can live long enough to plead for redemption, or explain she did it for Clark as she lies in a hospital bed. But apart from being a bit sick (we get ample closeups of her burnt face prosthetic - raw, pointless violence was used several times, such as when she punches Zod's face into a bloody mess with a Kryptonite knuckleduster!), there's no reason why Zod wouldn't have just burned her to a cinder. Except we have to have the possibility of a return next season - I was hoping this would be the last of her as she's no substitute for Lex Luthor, and she doesn't even serve in the position of his heir: she knows Clark's secret and, though she sometimes dips into being the bad guy, she hasn't seemed that much of an enemy this season, in general. Her teeth had been taken away, and yet she was an ineffectual ally to Clark's cause, so why keep her around? Technically, she does die before the end, so maybe she won't be back, but then we had that weird, hooded old woman knitting in the corridor who goes in to her after the doctors loudly note her death. Obviously some new terror for Clark to deal with (I assume), probably connected to the red dots surrounding Oliver Queen when he goes out of radio silence during his crawl around ventilation ducts to do… something.

Was he rejigging the satellite that he pulled out of his back pocket, which was somehow going to track the Kandorians, so that… the hero gang that Clark, Chloe and Queen had a video conference call with, could fight? Am I the only one that didn't follow all that was happening? It's often this way with the season finale, that they throw as many balls into the air that you're so befuddled watching the pretty colours to see where they drop or wonder why they're in the air in the first place. Chloe's reaction to his reveal that 'oh, by the way, I have this satellite set up' is to ask why he didn't tell her that before? 'It was a surprise,' is his rough and ready answer, but we know the real one is because the writers didn't think of it till now and suddenly needed it, and lo! it did appear. That's the level of plotting and planning shown in the quality of the writing, not just for this episode, but in an average episode. And yet, as ever, I can't really deny that it was relatively rip-roaring, it wasn't boring, but it just doesn't make a lot of sense, either logically or narratively. It's like modern 'Dr. Who,' it simply makes up whatever rules it needs as it goes along, and then it's never an issue again. Phew, got out of another tight story spot by… making stuff up on the spur of the moment. It's not satisfying or rewarding structuring, but if you keep things moving fast enough and throw in a few emotional bones, the audience is fooled into thinking 'this is fun and meaningful.' In reality it's pretty much meaningless.

What happened with Chloe? I was half expecting her to die, or at least move far away with Oliver, since I'm pretty sure she doesn't come back for Season 10. I could be wrong, but there's no dramatic sendoff or a sense of closure. The closest thing we got was the hint of goodbyes when Clark and she debate using The Book of Rao, knowing that will send all Kryptonians to a new planet, including Kal-El. Her last appearance is being worried when all the red dots swarm over Oliver's position on her map, he says they're not Kandorians, and she loses contact with him. She must at least return for an episode or two, I should imagine (a bit like Kes at the start of Season 4 of 'Voyager'), just to hand the story on. Let's back up a bit, however: The Book of Rao is the key to wiping the slate clean for next season and getting rid of those pesky Kandorians in one fell swoop. At least there was some justice in the scene where that actually happens. In fact, back up further, because there were a couple of moments that I did rather like: Lois realising the cold, clammy hand on her shoulder does not in fact belong to The Blur (though her investigative journalism skills lead her to finding Dr. Virgil Swann's diagram-heavy Kryptonian notebook, and that's what convinces her Clark's actually the bad guy, just because the Rao thing is pictured in there? Slender evidence…), and neither does he know the special place they shared. So he smacks her across the street in time for Clark to come along and give him a whopping great socking (I was thinking at the time it might be better for Clark to catch Lois rather than punch Zod, but of course he does both), then saves Lois (though the ropey effects come into play again with the awful glass shattering in the phone box that looked worse than the sort of CG you'd have seen in Season 1!).

It was great that Lois isn't bamboozled for long into picturing Clark as the enemy, that would have gotten old very quickly and strays dangerously into Lana Lang's cycle of belief/betrayal territory. Likewise, it was satisfying to have the Kandorians realise the true nature of their evil leader. But Zod, really? Are you so arrogantly stupid that you forget your entire army of soldiers have super hearing and can hear you whisper about killing Faora right in front of them?! That was almost the worst failing of the episode, only topped by the simple fact that holding Blue Kryptonite is enough to save you from being beamed up by The Book of Rao? How ridiculous can you get? So all that stuff about Clark saying his goodbyes and preparing to lead his people on this new planet because the effect will sweep every Kryptonian off to it, was absolute bunk! All he had to do was hold a bit of Blue Kryptonite, or, as it seemed, just stand near someone who was! Because the event only has a selective effect on the aliens: Clark isn't holding the Kryptonite, yet is mysteriously kept from being beamed away for no other reason than that he had to have a fight with Zod. That's what we all knew the end of the season would be, whatever else happened, and to be fair, aside from horrendous and selective logic, it wasn't a bad looking rumble (Zod's opening gambit of 'you love humans so much, let's see if you fight like one' reminded me of the advertising slogan used for 'The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time': 'Wilt thou get the girl, or play like one?'). But even that was nicked lock, stock and barrel from 'The Matrix Revolutions' - battering each other in the rain and I couldn't believe they even ripped off the exact same slow-motion punch to the face Neo lands on Agent Smith (but not as good)!

As always, it was a triumph of style over substance, because as soon as Clark has the knife stabbed into him, Zod's beamed, up, too. So why wasn't Clark, before that? And so it ends with Clark falling off a building, having been sliced, diced and stabbed. At least Zod was taken, I just hope he doesn't return, because although Callum Blue wasn't the worst one-season wonder, he wasn't that good, either. It wasn't much of a cliffhanger, just people in various places in jeopardy, but that's the norm for these things. I had to laugh at the opening recap, because if the episode itself was like one written by The Blur, this was a glance into the future taken to extremes: by current trends you can imagine that one day people will have such short attention spans they'll consume episodes in bite-sized chunks where every scene is a second or so, flashing constantly onto the next piece of dialogue or action, and this was the future now! It usually does its recaps in that manner, but this seemed even faster and choppier than ever before. It was interesting when Clark had his dream, or vision of destiny, with Lois at the planet working for Perry White (the cheapskates didn't bother getting one little scene with Michael McKean, even though he was in the previous episode!), and he sees himself as a red blur flying through the sky. It was also nice that Martha sent him what we can only assume is his Superman costume in the present day (we only see the red and yellow 'S' reflected in his pupils), which was a lovely reference to the hero he'll become, as was the John Williams-like moments of music.

Somehow Lex Luthor's said to be alive and kicking, so perhaps this was merely dream rather than vision, but still a fascinating preview of the eventual future (shown to be 2013, though that would have meant the series went on for at least twelve seasons, and it didn't). Rather than looking at the future, or potential future, it's worth taking a moment to look back. I've said it several times, but I do think Season 9 has been the best for a while. Not as good as Seasons 1 and 2, the golden years, but possibly on a par with Season 6, the previous year I felt had some proper good stuff (though Seasons 5 and 4 had their moments). Lois and Clark worked well, the other characters weren't too annoying, and while it could have been much more consistent there was a semi-regular delivery of good episodes here and there. I think it's going to be the first season I'll keep to watch again, whereas all previous seasons (post-Season 2), have been relegated to eBay sales. I don't think Tom Welling's been that great, but he's sort of settled into his niche. The other characters have been passable, though their arcs never really went anywhere (Chloe with her Big Brother, control freak attitude just dissipated; Oliver bounced from Tess to Chloe and we never got to see him as leader of the Justice League, despite the faces popping up - Hawkman actor Michael Shanks never even got a credit for this episode!; Tess was mercurial villainess one minute, crawling penitent the next), but Lois almost singlehandedly made it worth watching. As long as she isn't immediately taken into Clark's confidence next season the dynamic could continue, but we shall see.

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