Satan's Witches

DVD, Starsky & Hutch S3 (Satan's Witches)

With a deliberately provocative title, this is the next in a long line of horror episodes which have previously dealt with psychos, sadistic killers, cultists, vampires, voodoo and mental patients. Indeed, this is the fifth such episode this season and not the last ('Quadromania'), so it was always an avenue they liked exploring on the series. It's a bit bizarre that such a grounded, crime-based series would go off on these tangents, but strangely, I think it's thanks to the comedy side of S&H's partnership that it came about - the series started doing odd characters and having S&H react to them, plus you have the natural contrast in their personality that Hutch is always the rationalist and Starsky is much more superstitious and easily spooked, so it went from crackpots using the dark arts as a cover for their crime, to especially nasty criminals whose personality was the horror, to full horror stereotyped themes. Season 2 ran with it, going into mythical areas, and this is more in that line. In keeping with the series' light tone, much of the episode is comedic, especially compared to many of the 'issue' episodes we've seen this season. It starts out quite bright and happy (unless you count the curmudgeonly Starsky grumbling about the great outdoors), quite different to, say, 'Murder Ward' which opened right away with a portentous atmosphere. This time they're trying to create a contrast or build-up, though with such a title we weren't likely to be fooled into thinking this was just a buddies-on-holiday knockabout.

Actually, if they'd wanted to do a full-blown comedy this would have been the perfect setup, with Hutch eager and relishing nature, and Starsky immediately missing the comforts of home and not seeing the point of this trip. You wonder how Hutch talked him into going in the first place, but perhaps it was the journey in his partner's beat-up old car that had soured his mood and started him thinking about all the negatives. Hutch's familiarity with being out in the woods, as opposed to Starsky's naivety, is well played, but the whole episode could have done without any cults, perhaps just an unfriendly town their only problem. I thought the whole town was part of the cult and that was why they were being so uncooperative, so I was pleased to learn that it was because the Sheriff's daughter was being held as ransom while the evildoers held their ugly rituals in the area. Starsky does alright in the small town - being used to the mean streets (it's just the mysterious woods that push him out of his depth). He's quite at ease dealing with attitude from Ward (who unwisely smokes around the 'gas' pumps!), without escalating the confrontation, but also showing he's not going to be cowed. Hutch gets a similar opportunity to shine when he goes off to explore beyond the 'No Trespassing' sign in the woods - though faced with four opponents it never fazes him and he holds his own. He looked like he was about to get a beating if Rodell hadn't stepped in to stop it, but even then he didn't back down, a sign of strong character.

You get the impression this might have been one of those story ideas designed to keep the actors happy and give them something different to do. I'd love to know what they and the crew got up to between filming times. I can imagine campfires and a much more relaxed atmosphere than the usual - someone needs to research the series and get as much of David Soul and Paul Michael Glaser's memories committed to print as possible so the definitive book can be created, as there must be so many untold stories. Since every scene of the episode takes place out in the wilderness, we don't get even a glimpse of Huggy or Dobey, though the Captain is mentioned several times, since he's the owner of the cabin at Pine Lake, which he's allowed his men to use for a nice, four-day weekend. I was thinking that it was rather stupid of the cultists to hold their rituals so close to the cabin of a known Captain of Police! But that was when I was still thinking it was the townsfolk that were the enemy, so it makes more sense when you realise the cultists have moved in from some other area. Still, it's very unpleasant seeing people hailing Satan, even in entertainment, so although the cultists are certainly bad guys, there's absolutely nothing to sympathise with them and I prefer to have rounded enemies for S&H to go up against. At least they didn't try and paint them as ordinary people just doing their thing as I have the impression would happen in modern TV.

Though S&H are on their own, they do have one other character on their side: Hutch's old car. Making them use this makes a lot of sense - partly because it was Hutch's idea so he would be driving, and also to subtly demonstrate that they're away from the usual icons of their strength. They don't have the flashy Torino (which wouldn't have been much good in the dirt tracks and country roads, anyway), and they don't have their guns. So they're forced to live on their wits to survive. When they arrive all that means is that they need to catch some food and get cooking, but when they come up against the human threat it shows that they can be good cops without the equipment they usually depend on. It takes a bit of brute force, gall and planning for them to rescue Lizzie Tyce, the Sheriff's captive daughter, not to mention their persuasive skills to have Ward let them out of the town jail after Sheriff Tyce has locked them up to prevent them interfering and his daughter being killed. But their experience and knowledge leads them to surmise that Lizzie isn't going to last the night, and I had the impression Ward went there because he was troubled. Perhaps not by the wrongful arrest, but maybe he had an inkling that these two energetic cops could help out, though he has to be persuaded. He must have wanted to confide in someone, and outsiders were ideal.

The comedy stems from S&H's personalities and mostly from the ultimate personality clash. We've seen it so often before, they're pretty much chalk and cheese in their approach to life, so Hutch is by far the more outdoors type. That is, until the Martin sisters turn up, and suddenly Starsky's a keen camper. It's the old gag of them fighting over each other to get to the girl (or girls, in this case), though as often happens, Starsky is at a disadvantage, though less from ignorance as being caught in his underwear! This time the girls, Julie and Tricia, are nefarious sirens out to distract the unwary to their deaths - you know they're bad because they left a poor snake in the fridge! Who knows how long it might have had to stay in there, and reptiles like to be warm. But leaving aside animal cruelty, that was a good sequence with Starsky falling backwards and freezing, he can only wait for Hutch to come in and see the danger. It's a bit like that time a dead rat was left in Hutch's fridge in his apartment when being victimised in 'Vendetta,' it's the horror of domestic comfort being invaded by something disgusting or lethal when least expected that is far more scary than people chanting or waving fiery brands around in the dark. You could say it was a lesson for the pair to learn, as pretty girls are probably their biggest weakness, and as usual they were reeled in, hook, line and sinker.

That comedy suddenly interrupted by terror is the horror of the episode, though it does make it more watchable than when it's pure nastiness or relentless fear as there are plenty of fun moments to enjoy. Since their partnership is so strong you never see the bleak realisation of having to work alone as we have in some episodes - then it's no fun, for them or us, until we see them overcome their situation. There's much more room for fun in this one, despite the title and attempt at making a seventies horror film - even when they're up against it, they're making jokes or being witty. You only have to look at the scene when they retreat into the cabin and have Lizzie throw the lights so whenever they come on S&H are in a different part of the room, making the cultists look foolish as they take them out with various apparatus, like the phone (I hope Dobey doesn't mind the chaos and mess they made). Even though they're a strong team you could see that it was going to be all over for them if the Sheriff and several police cars hadn't turned up - although, even surrounded by the red hoods they don't give up, but keep back to back and get into martial arts poses, but sheer weight of numbers would have overwhelmed them before too long. So the signs of their strength being weakened by using Hutch's car and being out of their element was correct.

Even so, I'd place it in the positive category as it remains light throughout and there's much attractive scenery, it's never oppressive, even when the cultists are moving in on S&H. There's nothing like 'Murder Ward' where Hutch, drugged up, has to stumble away from an enemy, or even 'The Avenger,' to come in Season 4, the epitome of horror on the series. For Season 3, it's probably one of the lightest, funniest episodes, which is surprising, but I suppose it's also saying that you can't take such people too seriously (or maybe it's a warning that you should, since S&H were about to buy the farm before the police arrived). They'd never give up, though, and together they're much stronger, so you don't really feel too much danger for them personally. Though Starsky would disagree as Hutch teases him, taking advantage of his jitteriness. One thing that did stand out as being fairly innovative was the use of people humming as part of the musical score, which was alien and uncomfortable because it's not what we're used to on the series. There hasn't been a lot of music of note this season, so this was something different. There were, however, plenty of familiar tropes, gags and pop culture. Aside from S&H's opposing views on nature (turned on its head by the end when Hutch wants to get out and Starsky's become attuned to it and wants to stay - until he hears a bear!), we also see Starsky's disregard for Hutch's car again, banging the door on the store's wooden support, and Hutch even drives into a tree, so it's no wonder the vehicle is so full of dents!

Hutch mentions country singer and actor, John Denver (as in, questioning whether this ever happened to him), Rodell is also described as 'Mad Merlin,' Starsky claims he spends more time in the woods than Bigfoot when showing off to the Martins, and also says the holiday has been a 'Twilight Zone' from the word go. Hutch sings a bit of the old 'Summertime,' and Starsky performs his comical leap onto the back of a bigger opponent when they go to rescue Lizzie. I also noticed that one of the cultists was a regular background face - the guy with the large moustache and mound of hair who looks a bit Mexican, had been in various episodes, most recently in previous one, 'The Trap,' getting bumped in the foot chase on the street. He must be one of the stunt team. Joseph Ruskin's thin, severe face was ideal as leader of the cult (he was in many TV shows, such as 'Star Trek,' 'DS9' and 'Voyager' for decades, dying in 2013), and was given 'Special Guest Star' status. There were also three returning faces: Patricia Wilson (Rachel Tyce), had been in 'Little Girl Lost,' Robert Raymond Sutton (Rodell's lieutenant, Cabot), was in 'Survival,' and Charles Napier had put his criminal past behind him ('Texas Longhorn') to play the Sheriff. It's sad when you realise how many actors from this era have died in the last few years, as, although I wasn't around in that decade, it doesn't seem that long ago.

**