Gemini

DVD, Smallville S7 (Gemini)

A Christmas episode full of love, joy and goodwill… is what this is not. It must be a Christmas episode, but although there's an overdose of hugging and irritating seasonal jingles, it's 'Smallville,' so what can you expect? Not the real Julian Luthor as it turns out! I should have guessed that Gabriel Grant, aka Lex' brother, was a cloned creation, not the real thing. Forget my comments in the previous review about the reappearance of Julian messing up all those episodes where Lex was influenced by that death, as it did all happen. Why did I not guess? It makes me even more convinced that Lana's going to turn out to be a clone, too, but before I start suspecting everyone of being a clone (really the entire series ended seasons ago and this is all playing out in a giant Lex-created fantasy world because he couldn't give it up), I'm sure the writers won't be going back to that well any time soon.

Saying that, Clark is back to his clone-like self as Bizarro, the creature that caused trouble in last season's finale and the opening to this one. In a way, I was glad it wasn't Clark because he was acting a bit out of character - he returns from the Fortress to say he wants to join Lana in her fight against Lex, to make sure he's locked up, while also giving up on ever finding Kara. The series isn't the best written I've ever followed so I expect this kind of weak plotting and seemingly out of character behaviour - at least this time it was part of the story and not a plotting flaw. There were still plenty of those. Why go to the trouble of planting a bomb on Chloe, locking her in a lift shaft and then not having an immediate detonation when it was activated? Maybe the clone guy thought he'd need a minute to get clear of the building or the vicinity of the lift, but it's one of those things there to service the plot and not logic. For that matter where did the guy get all this stuff and how could he have access to the Planet so intimately that he could foul up a lift with people inside, set up a cordon so no one went near it and found a space from which he could monitor everything? And why couldn't anyone hear Chloe and Jimmy in the lift shaft? In one of those things sound travels to every floor!

What should have been a spectacular sequence of superspeed rescue didn't have the impressive quality these set-pieces need to wow. I thought at first Clark was actually flying (and in retrospect, he probably was since it was his double who was seen to, previously), instead of leaping up the inside of the Daily Planet, but it was the little hop over the bannister at the top that lost it reality points - even if he'd judged the distance perfectly, it didn't look as though he'd leaped up from a long way down. Did Jimmy not notice that the bomb was no longer there when the lift doors opened? Did he not think what a miracle it was, and then remember that it was Clark Chloe had called? Did Bizarro take Clark's phone? It was all a bit stupid and daft (though for once it's not Lois who's being dim) - that they were even locked in a lift together was so uninventive. Whenever two characters have problems, shut them in a life or death room and let them open up.

It was a good thing Chloe told Jimmy she was a meteor freak, as she put it, so that was another development on the 'tick' side of things. I began to wonder if she'd mastered the negative side effects of slumping unconscious as she did when she saved Lois' life, but it was only a scratch she was healing this time so the pain wasn't anywhere near as intense. I was so glad she didn't have to cry on Jimmy's finger to make it all better! I see that they were going for a humorous style for the lift moments, what with the perpetual tinkly Christmas music and the awkwardness, and of course the doors opening to the party. So there was some feeling of Christmas in the episode beyond tacky decorations and pretty lights. Gabriel (!) even gets in a mention of God and free will so it must have been Christmas! They wouldn't broach such things normally.

Regarding the mysterious clone man, Adrian, he looked right away as if he was a younger actor with extensive makeup to look older, and when we learn he was an aged version of Gabriel/Julian, I assumed it must be Michael Cassidy playing dual roles. This would fit with a few shots where they looked like they were lining up their eye-lines to try and make it look real, but with all that he didn't sound like the same guy. It must have been, and with that knowledge I appreciated the detail in the makeup, but it's always the bright eyes of youth and the subtly higher pitch of voice that gives it away. It was a typical story of the series, with a loon (or apparent loon) coercing or affecting the characters into a course of action they wouldn't normally take - I'm sure he wouldn't have been able to see through the camera on Lois' broach when she had the gun up as her arms were obscuring it.

I liked the references to Milton Fine, and that Lex and Julian have a fencing match in the mansion. I always think these activities should be done in a much bigger room at the mansion instead of hugging those same sets. It's also true that we've seen better swordplay in the past, but that would be niggling. The woman left in a weird state by the metallic fluid was called Casey Brock and I was half expecting Venom to show up until I nixed the idea, knowing that character is a Marvel property and one a DC series was never going to be allowed to use. But black goo from space and a host by the name of Brock? A tribute, perhaps. Turns out (I guess) that it was Bizarro again, which doesn't fill me with joy, Christmas or otherwise. Evil Clark has been done to death. And that explosion was very weak. And now Lex has bought the Planet (with a big 'P,' not a small one!). Plus mushy moments galore? How many bad ideas can they squeeze into one story?

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