Ballad For a Blue Lady

DVD, Starsky & Hutch S4 (Ballad For a Blue Lady)

As soon as you see it's directed by Paul Michael Glaser you know it's going to be morose and slow in an arty kind of way. And it was. Too much lingering camerwork, and wacky angles. Not that that's bad in itself, but it doesn't fit with the series' style and feels radically different to the other episodes.

The story was the same old 'one of them falls for some dodgy lady' thing. I thought the guy that played her brother Harry was a standout performance, really nailing that worried tightrope of knowing where he was and having faint hope things would improve Unfortunate he shared the name of the serial killer from earlier in the season though.

Fun to have Malachi Throne as the baddie (he'd been a Commodore in 'Star Trek'), and Huggy had a good little scene jogging along with Starsky in the car, but that end sequence... straight from a sad death scene to the two cops in a funny tag. It had no bearing on the story and seemed a little out of place. No mention of Mary-Anne or the fate of Fitch.

**

Calling

DVD, Smallville S2 (Calling)

I'm glad it didn't end with Chloe walking away, sad, but with the exciting cliffhanger. A proper two-parter at last? There's a lot happening here, as a whole, despite the slightly overmuch soap stuff. I didn't expect Dr. Walden to come back, and he gives a different challenge to the meteorite-infectees of old, although of course he is neatly tied up. Lionel shows once again his truly evil self, Chloe her truly loyal friendship and yet he was closer than he knew perhaps, and the price of her friendship is deep sadness. That aspect of it is so sad.

Pete walks in for his one and only scene (which was a funny one), but he felt like a stranger almost, it's so rare to have him in the series, it seems. Definitely an underused character. And I was surprised that Lex really had been the one to have stolen the vial of blood. It shows he is actively, if not against the Kent's, not willing to miss the revelations about Clark, by now he must have a fairly rounded picture of Clark's secret. Like Chloe I think he feels that once again, even the most trustworthy of people are not to be fully trusted. He only truly has himself. And that's very sad, but at the same time comes from his own choices. Chloe could choose to give up all hopes of love from Clark, and Lex could give up all claim to knowledge. Yet he must now compete on his Father's terms in his eyes, deceit becoming his friend, lies his shield as others have to him. For the first time he lies like his Father - calmly, coolly, to his bride to be, with the same kind of manner.

It's all so sad, but at the same time it has enough mythology stuff to keep the interest piqued (and it made me jump a couple of times!), so although it's not one of the better ones it's kind of important to the ongoing plots even if events are not panning out as one would like... (My DVD played incorrectly so I started with the scene when Lex shows Clark the empty cell, and it was only after a while I realised it hadn't started at the beginning!).

***

Assignment: Earth

DVD, Star Trek S2 (Assignment: Earth)

Immediately you're put on the back foot. Kirk tosses aside the news they've just popped back in time to basically have a look or something - it's a bit vague, and with nary time for a thought about what that means and why, and sundry other questions, the episode's off! To be generous, at least he mentioned that they did it in the usual way as seen in last year's 'Tomorrow Is Yesterday', even if it does seem weird for them to go back to a time a year after they visited last year. Do they plan on doing it every year? Kind of an annual outing to the past? It does throw up all sorts of possibilities, or it would if you had five seconds to think about it. Take Captain Christopher who came aboard in the previous episode. They could drop in on him to see how his family's doing. Put away such thoughts because one thing this episode deson't do is make the most of the situation.

In fact it's a confused mish-mash that doesn't explain itself too well, and feels like another series, maybe one of those 60's ITC series. Which is pretty accurate as it was written with the hopes of a spin-off for Mr. Gary Seven. He's a fine character, what we learn of him, which isn't a lot, despite the screentime he nobbles from the regulars. The way he calmly seems in control, even when he's not, makes for a mysterious and intriguing character, much like Spock. Add to that his black cat (bizarre how the first episode of the season had a black cat/woman and so does the last!), and Dr. Who-style catch-all pen-gadget, you never know what tricks he has up his immaculately turned out sleeve.

Back to the Star Trek portions though, and it's good they get right into the story, it's good they use all the main cast, even if sparingly, and it's nice Mr. Leslie gets called by name again. No one seems to remember his death a few weeks ago! The transporter room has been upgraded and now has a science station and viewscreen, unless this is another room, but I assumed there was only one, or Kirk would say "meet me in the transporter room" and half the landing party would arrive a few minutes late, realising they'd gone to the wrong one! Before long Kirk and Spock are mingling, with the Vulcan's trademark hat (something later emulated by 'Stargate' alien Teal'c). But you soon realise this isn't going to be playing up to the endless possibilities when they simply walk around, have trouble with Seven (as in Gary, not 'Of Nine'). It's a nice touch (or it was a cost-cutting measure, either way works for me) to see Seven with a fully-operational multitronic computer, as seen in 'The Ultimate Computer' - it shows how advanced Seven's alien leaders are, which is good as they're not too revealing when it comes to these beings. Their planet is invisible apparently, and they've trained up Seven and other humans for generations. Also their blue cloud transporter looks real cool.

There is humour, such as Seven's misunderstnding with the secretary, who provides a lot of the laughs, or the police being beamed up and beamed down again, though as with most of the gags they've already been done better in previous episodes. The cat was very well trained even if the meowling sounded like a human, and it was fun to see the automatic doors on the Enterprise open just wide enough for it to pass through. Sort of auto catflap, where the ship saves door opening power!

It's often the way there's a lot of note happening in episodes that aren't the best example of a strong episode, and this is true here. Doohan for example, lends his voice to an intercom in the mission control area. What makes for a slightly lower class of story is the lack of excitement and drama - half the time we don't really know what's happening, with Seven doing his stuff, coupled with the lack of Enterprise crew integrated into the story. If this had been the last ever episode you would feel cheated out of a 'proper' episode.

I hoped for a final scene onboard the ship where Kirk discusses the events and makes a joke or a statement as often happens. Sometimes you don't want that kind of ending, but for once that would have really enhanced the ending, especially as it's the end of a season. So it feels a bit disjointed to go from Gary and Roberta having a little chat and seeing Kirk and Spock beam up, and then a shot of the ship leaving to explore planets new, and unsatisfying. A word that would describe the episode as a whole, as the concepts and ideas were in evidence, they just weren't melded together.

**

The Final Countdown

DVD, The Champions

The one with the syrup as I like to think of it. All those super powers and it takes but a jar of syrup to save the day. There's a moral in there somewhere... Actually their powers weren't quite as in evidence in this one, or used in less spectacular ways. Look at the post-credits bit. It's a nice little scene with children playing in the snow, and it's good to have something different, but the likelihood of them finding a bomb a few centimetres under the snow, whacking it against a pice of wood, and it only explodes when Richard rushes to the rescue and throws it away... well let's just say that's not the end of such illogic.

Take the scene with one of the best stunts they ever did - chucking a car off a clifftop, like it's James Bond. Not even thinking too much about the padding, such as the guy getting out of the car, opening the gate and the cars drive through, and... etc - there was a bit too much padding all over, with slow scenes, and Nemesis taking so long to track the place down. But back to the illogic, if that be a word. The car gets mashed, yet the unfortunate driver appears in hospital with his only damage seemingly to his voicebox as he can't speak. Hardy men these Germans!

You have to admire the sets sometimes, such as the outside shots, which looked real. And the fight was pretty exciting, even though it was odd the Germans didn't use their guns. They were taken unawares, and maybe they'd emptied their guns to be on the safe side? As much as it had some great stuff (Richard and Craig's synchronised leaping through glass windows, Craig's chair snapping, Tremayne's involvment on the phones, and what usually would be the tag scene which happened early on in the episode where he wants Richard to explain and they disappear!), the padding dragged it down, and it took too long to tell it's story where it could have made more excitement or quirks.

**

Bloodlines

DVD, TNG S7 (Bloodlines)

Everything goes a bit Star Trek II there for a while, but I had a kind of feeling Vigo wouldn't be Picard's son after all (mainly because he boos about not having any heirs in the first film), though I'm not sure how Bok was able to resquence his DNA, beam through the Enterprise shields at huge distances and have powerful enough sensors to keep track of all these people! Something tells me Starfleet should get back onto the Subspace Transporter bandwagon... (maybe in a 25th century series?).

I'm all for continuity and bringing back old faces, but the episode didn't live up to the 'The Battle' which as I recall was one of the best episodes of S1. After DS9, and specifically Quark, you realise how badly Ferengi can be done, and the ones in this don't come across as favourably, with little personality or dimensionality. And Deanna seemed easily cowed where usually she'd give as good as she got! It seems to be a tradition that S7's of a series have to have some rather slow episodes, and this is further proof. Not bad, but a little pointless by the end (and if it had been DS9 Jason probably would have died or something).

**

The Omega Glory

DVD, Star Trek S2 (The Omega Glory)

Not sure how suited the title is to the episode, but the actual thing was a fine story with some action, the odd clever twist, and you get to see Sulu take command (and his helm computer viewer moved! Wow!).

Quite rare to see a face used again in another role (Bill Campbell was one, but he was in Klingon makeup and looked quite different to Trelane - Captain Tracey looks very similar to Dr. Van Gelder, except with neater hair and less mad eyes... for most of the episode anyway!).

I guessed as soon as I saw those uniforms with crystals coming out of them that it must be the crew and I was surprised the landing party didn't twig it at once. I like the idea they could be trapped forever on that planet, unable to leave or they would die (like that cartoon episode where they have to breathe underwater from then on). I was very surprised to find this was a fourth parallel Earth tale - you don't really discover it until near the end. The best moment for me was when Kirk is thrown into a cage with two seemingly savage natives, who are going to fight until they're tired, and Spock points out that they can take a break by alternating with him!

Tracey is another figure in Starfleet that drops his ideals at the first impulse and ends up on murderous rampages, killing thousands of Omegans and trying to kill Kirk! I suppose his crew had been reduced to dust, he'd become permanently marooned and he thought he'd discovered the secret to eternal youth. So if he went a bit crazy you can forgive him. But he was still clear-headed enough to try and talk Kirk into death at the end - the fight with the two of them strapped together by one hand reminded me of the Andorian/Archer fight in 'Enterprise'.

Oddly both Scotty and Chekov were absent. I would guess Scott must have been either too ill to take command or was at another location (perhaps an engineering conference, or helping people on another planet and due to be picked up). Maybe the ending was a little heavy-handed with such direct parallel to American culture, but there was enough fighting, peril, humour and story interest to sustain it.

***

The Golden Angel

DVD, Starsky & Hutch S4 (The Golden Angel)

It doesn't matter that this is a very simple story and you can guess quite early that the crazy ex-wife is responsible. It doesn't matter that the big fight is a little quiet, with a lack of a huge audience and loud enough cheering. Because it makes you laugh, it's fun, and it does just what you want it to do. You know that Starsky's going to be brought down a peg by the end, getting only a small gift from his uncle's will. You want him to go up against the big guy in the ring. It happens, just like it should. Sometimes in episodes you get to hoping for a certain conclusion, by the nature of the way the story is going, and it doesn't always do what you want or expect. But this one does.

Wrestling is ideal for the series, since it's larger than life, with crazy characters, just like the series! Add to this, Huggy and Dobey well integrated and you get a solid all-rounder. There's a bit of tension, with the threats against Golden Angel, the best part of which must be where he waits to answer the phone and becomes a target because they're trying to trace the call, turning the police's procedures against them. The resolution is fast and exciting, even if she is an awful shot, shooting multiple bullets around, yet not hitting anyone. For a change the villain of the piece isn't really important, it's the process the duo go through that is the enjoyment.

***